Breaking News! Ted Thompson Outsources Draft Selections to India

Green Bay

Packernation was rocked this afternoon when news leaked out that Packers General Manager TedTed Thompson Thompson has been outsourcing his draft decisions to India-based virtual assistant website Brickwork. The story broke when an email message from Ted Thompson to his virtual assistant Boolah Meshang was accidentally forwarded to Mark Murphy’s office. The Cheese Newswire has procured a copy of a portion of the misdirected email: Continue reading

JJ Watt Ready To Take the Next Step With Texans: Starting Quarterback

JJ Watt 3JJ Watt has done it all for the Texans, and after a rigorous off-season program at his cabin in Wisconsin, he is ready to start at quarterback. JJ is without question the best player on the Texans’ team and in the NFL, your best player has to be your quarterback so the logic is there. And after not winning league MVP last year, Texans fans everywhere should have guessed he would try throwing the rock next.  Continue reading

Browns Unveil Latest Futile Attempt to Keep Fans Interested

Browns revealCLEVELAND — After years of relying on day one trades for useless players to keep it’s fan-base interested, the Cleveland Browns have found yet another angle. Over 27 fans poured into the Cleveland Convention Center Tuesday and cheered wildly as current and former players struggled to extricate themselves from rain ponchos for the reveal of the Browns’ new uniforms.

Team President, Alec Scheiner described the new uniforms in detail.

“They’re just like the old uniforms except they haven’t been around as long.” said Scheiner. The colors symbolize the team’s commitment to being just like it was last year except it will be like that during this year, which is the new part.” Continue reading

NFC North Smacktalk MEME

The Cheese is at it again with smacktalk for the NFC North. Spread it around and make your HairkiniWednesday a little snarkier! :)

The Cheese is dedicated to honest, hard-hitting, cutting-edge snark for the factose intolerant.

To see the latest NFC North Smacktalk meme click here: Continue reading

Aaron Rodgers Fined $25,000 For NCAA Court Appearance

aaron at Badgers v ArizonaIt looks like Aaron Rodgers’ court appearance at the Badgers versus Arizona game will cost him another court appearance. The NCAA announced late last night that Aaron will be fined $25,000 for “being there for young players, cheering on the college team in his state of residence, and other conduct unbecoming a superstar athlete”.  Continue reading